Why do I keep getting replies from people expressing their expectations while denying that they are expressing expectations?
No one HAS to pick up anyone’s “slack.” If you are displeased with someone you just exclude him from your circle of associates. Let him be to fend for himself. He is not your concern.
Katie, the original author, acknowledged that after a series of bad dates she is now in a happy relationship.
Like most of us, she had to kiss many frogs before one became a prince.
Now that she has found someone with whom to build a life, why is she entitled to demand that men in general conform to her expectations? Again, if they displease her, she can exclude them from her circle of associates. If they fail to, as Angel says, “handle their own shit,” no one expects her to handle it for them. No one is expecting Katie to marry one of the men from that TV show. As Katie pointed out, none of the women on the show married those men. Both the women and the men are free to carry on with their lives.
None of us are entitled to someone who rises to our standards. We must search long and hard to find that person if he or she exists. If some men or women prefer to behave in ways you consider “immature,” that is their prerogative. They are not obligated to meet your standards of maturity. It is your prerogative to avoid them.
You assert that NO woman wants to “mother” a man. Lecturing men about their bad habits is a form of mothering.
I doubt there is no woman anywhere who wants to do whatever it is that you consider “mothering.” If that is what a man desires, then good luck finding her. If he is successful, you may, if you wish, be resentful. I don’t know why you would want to be, but that is your prerogative. If he is unsuccessful, that is his problem.
