I have thoughts. They are my own, not supported by any expert opinions or research.

I'll begin with a theory of mine that I believe explains a lot:

Men experience sexual access to women as a scarce resource. Their behavior is consistent with the behavior of any population that is experiencing scarcity of any essential resource.

They pursue the resource aggressively. They push boundaries and test limits in pursuit of the resource. When given an opportunity to obtain the resource they are less likely to consider the consequences of their actions. They are prepared to take risks in pursuit of the resource. The population wide level of ethical and moral consideration declines with respect to efforts to obtain the scarce resource. When offered the resource, they are unlikely to question the sincerity of the offer.

I have described the general characteristics of any population experiencing scarcity of any essential resource. The same characteristics apply to men seeking sexual access to women.

Men understand what rape is, but they interpret consent differently than women often do. For example, if a man applies persuasion after a woman has said "no," and she changes to "yes," he might consider that valid consent; many women would consider it rape.

The man is acting in accordance with the common behavior of one who is experiencing scarcity; he is pushing boundaries - testing limits. If she gives in and changes her "no" to a "yes" he is not likely to question the sincerity of her yes.

Another example involves the subject we are discussing. If a woman agrees to have sex when she is profoundly intoxicated, but not unconscious, the man is less likely to question the validity of her consent. He has acquired access to a scarce resource and will act accordingly.

You are correct; sex without consent is rape. Men know that, but they interpret consent more liberally than women might. Having gained a woman's agreement, a man is not likely to question the sincerity of that agreement and risk losing the opportunity to acquire a scarce resource

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"Re. rape, prosecution is completely irrelevant. It is rarely prosecuted..."

There are acts that are prosecutable, even if they are not actually prosecuted. A good, responsible citizen refrains from acts that are prosecutable, even if he could "get away with it" - he avoids doing harm to others. Character is doing the right thing when no one is looking.

Before I retired, I worked in a maximum security prison for 33 years. There were plenty of convicts serving time for rape. Someone was arresting, charging, and prosecuting them.