I can understand your reluctance to denigrate women. If my use of the term "chicksplaining" denigrates anything, it is Feminism and Feminist ideals, rather than women per se. Rather than denigration, however, I consider it a form of satire.
I am particularly fond of the alliterative connection between the terms "chicksplaining" and "explaining" (the similarity between the "iks" sound in chicksplaining and the "ex" sound in explaining), a connection lacking with the term "mansplaining."
In the end, I'm just a born smart-alec.
My perspective is similar to yours with respect to Feminists telling men how to be men. Usually, they are telling us to stop doing, saying, and thinking things that best serve our interests and instead do, say, and think things that best serve their interests. I recognize no obligation to conform my conduct, my thoughts, or the content of my conversations to Feminists' expectations.
It doesn't bother me when Feminists accuse us of "mansplaining" or convey their expectations of us. They are easy enough to ignore. But, sometimes, I can't resist the opportunity to respond with a well-placed, pertinent smart-alec remark.
This comment aptly summarizes my general approach to Feminism:
