Excellent questions. I hope to answer each to your satisfaction. It will take me some time and thought, as is evident from the time that has elapsed since you posed those questions.
1. What makes people trustworthy in your eyes? More specifically, what would you need to see in order to trust in women’s stories of abuse/discrimination/oppression etc?
1)— I trust the stories of those with whom I am personally familiar, those with whom I am well acquainted and particularly those with whom I am intimately acquainted. I trust most of my acquaintances to tell honest and accurate stories and there are others who I can trust to lie, deceive and manipulate; but I know who is who among them.
In the case of public figures I default to skepticism. I am particularly skeptical of activists whose stories conveniently support the causes in which they are active. Even more so, I am skeptical of those whose status and income are dependent upon their activism. I don’t particularly trust those who have a vested interest in creating a widespread impression that their stories are honest and accurate in order to attract a following. Those I most distrust are politicians.
2. Since you didn’t comment on it directly, do you trust the statistics that show gendered (or race based) discrimination/abuse (e.g. almost every woman has experienced sexual harassment and at least 1/6 women will be raped in their lifetime)?
2) — Studies show that 96.43% of all statistics are numbers that somebody made up out of thin air to support whatever claims they are making.
Figures don’t lie, but liars can figure.
As you may be aware, there are those who challenge the statistics that you have cited and cite their own statistics. Feminists will then assert that the counter statistics are invalid for one reason or another. Their adversaries will then assert that the Feminists’ statistics are invalid, and on it goes. I avoid getting involved in those sorts of statistical artillery duels that commonly occur on the internet. The kind of arguments they inspire look like this:
I have no interest in getting involved in that kind of argument.
You may be pleased to learn however that I don’t need statistics to convince me that men aggressively pursue sexual access to women and that, as a consequence, women experience a surplus of unwanted, uninvited sexual attention that causes them distress. Men experience sexual access to women as a scarce resource. Their behavior is consistent with the behavior of any population experiencing a scarcity of any essential resource. There is a wide range of aggressive behaviors that men display in pursuit of sexual access. At one end of the range are a few men who don’t pursue aggressively at all. At the far end are a few men who pursue access through rape and assault. Most men fall in the middle somewhere. The range can be represented by a typical bell curve.
Where I differ with many Feminists is with their claim that men’s aggressive pursuit of sexual access is the result of an artificially imposed system and that the situation can be alleviated by imposing a different system that they, Feminists, will construct and impose.
I understand the situation I have described to be a manifestation of common human character flaws such as lust, jealousy, envy, greed and selfishness, and of the differences between male and female sexuality. Those flaws and sexuality differences are present in individuals and would be present in any social order or system.
I have recently posted a comment that explains some of the above concepts more thoroughly:
3. If you do believe the statistics, do you think they are enough justification for women’s fear of their safety?
3) — It is the prerogative of each individual woman to determine whether to fear for her safety; she has no obligation to justify any fear. I live in a small, rather conservative and peaceful community. It is substantially safer than most larger communities. Women appear to move about freely in public with little if any fear. Women’s fear for their safety seems to vary from community to community. I would welcome you to become a member of this community and leave your fear behind.
In many communities there are also men who fear for their safety, although they are less likely to fear for their sexual safety than women are. It seems that one reason that women fear for their sexual safety is that they are more vulnerable to sexual aggression from men than men are to sexual aggression from women. A woman is more likely to be intimidated by an act of sexual aggression from a man than a man would be by the exact same act of aggression from a woman. Women’s fear for their sexual safety is as much a product of women’s perception as it is of men’s behavior. Women’s greater vulnerability to sexual aggression is a result of inherent differences between male and female sexuality.
I can offer a personal example. Once, many years ago, I was “Kavanaughed.” That’s right, a woman who had had a bit too much to drink tackled me and attempted to sexually assault me. And, as in the incident involving Ms. Ford, her friends who were present convinced her to desist. Unlike the incident involving Ms. Ford, it didn’t ruin the rest of my life; in fact, it didn’t even ruin the rest of my afternoon. I had been invited to the neighbor’s to watch a rerun of “Star Trek.” Subsequent to the incident we all enjoyed the episode with my attacker present. I now recall the incident as mildly amusing. Quite a difference between one man’s reaction and one woman’s reaction to the exact same kind of incident, wouldn’t you say? True, it is only a single anecdotal example, but it nicely illustrates the difference between male and female sexuality and the difference in how we perceive and respond to sexual aggression from the opposite sex.
4. And most importantly, what would you like to see happen in the future? Put differently, what is your prefered solution to these problems (whatever you define those problems to be, as this was in fact not entirely clear to me)?
4) — The problem that most concerns me, within the context of this conversation, is Feminists and others who expect me to prioritize their interests ahead of my own when our interests conflict, while offering me no particular incentive to do so. The solution for me is to recognize that I am not obliged to prioritize according to their expectations.
Problems that arise in connection with the sexual dynamic whereby men experience sexual access to women as a scarce resource and consequently women experience a surplus of unwanted, uninvited and distressful sexual attention are a manifestation of the inherent differences between male and female sexuality. The solution is for each individual is to adjust to the reality of that dynamic; I can think of no way to eliminate it. Most commonly, one eventually finds a mate whose character, personality and sexuality is compatible with his or her own, and that alleviates the problem for those individuals. Not everyone is successful in that endeavor. In the end each must adjust in his or her own way.
You specifically mentioned “gendered” abuse as an issue. Abuse is harmful and distressful to its victims and effort should be exerted to prevent its occurrence and to sanction those who perpetrate it. I see no basis for classifying certain acts of abuse as “gendered” and focusing on those distinct acts to the exclusion of others. Acts of abuse are manifestations of common human character flaws such as lust, greed, envy, jealousy, and selfishness, among others. Those flaws are characteristic of individuals and would manifest in any cultural system.
Abuse and discrimination, and crime in general are manifestations of individuals’ character flaws and would manifest within any cultural system. The character flaws that are responsible for those acts occur across a range. A few individuals are selfless saints; another few are cruel, selfish scoundrels. Most individuals fall somewhere in between, sometimes acting selfishly and other times displaying consideration and generosity. The range might be accurately represented as a typical bell curve.
I find relations among the various races to be a topic that is distinct from the topic of relations between the sexes. Any similarity between the two topics is at most peripheral. None of the statistics that you cited apply to issues involving relations among different racial groups.
I do recognize that some racial minorities are subject to discrimination at the hands of some members of the majority race.
The future will unfold in its own time, at its own pace, and in its own way. In our other conversation I referred you to comments I have written that more thoroughly explain the way I understand how cultural systems arise and evolve. Cultural systems evolve to meet new challenges as they arise. They rarely conform to the intentions of individuals or factions within a population. Attempts to design and implement a cultural system that meets one’s desired specifications are destined to be futile.
