PEACE IS RESTORED
Part I is here:
From the moment I confronted Linda with my knowledge of her affair and my threat to contact her cheating partner’s wife, her behavior and attitude towards me changed drastically, as abruptly as a chameleon changes colors.
She became warm and — yes — loving. There was no longer any sign that she was unhappy with me. We returned to a peaceful and harmonious life. We even resumed more frequent physical intimacy, with joy, and affection.
Was this all just a pretense? I don’t think so. I don’t believe her contempt was genuine in the first place. Partly, she was frustrated over being married to one man but wanting to be with another. She blamed me as if I was intentionally thwarting her by the simple circumstances of our marriage. Also, it was a way of creating a facade, a pretense that she had good reason to end our marriage and dismantle the family that had nothing to do with her affair, thus alleviating her guilt. She may have been hoping that I might simply decide to initiate a separation, therefore I would bear the burden of responsibility. With the illusion shattered her normal affectionate attitude was able to emerge from its darkness.
Linda took no further steps to separate from me. For one thing, it was obvious that Paul’s wife Regina was unaware of the affair. Otherwise, my letter would not have carried the weight that it did. Until Paul separated from Regina, Linda could only have limited contact with him. I suppose her separating from me had no particular immediate urgency.
If she was still even seeing Paul, which I have no doubt she was, it was not obvious to me. I had no further incentive to eavesdrop on her phone calls. She would not have been so audacious as to invite him to the house when Mary Ann or I were there. She would not have been so transparent as to make a flimsy excuse to leave the house to meet him. She had agreed to be respectful and she was being respectfully discrete.
The Pin
I noticed that Linda wore an artistically designed metal pin on her jacket. I knew that Paul did that kind of work. I commented on the pin.
Linda smiled and said, “Paul gave it to me.”
That was confirmation that she was still actively seeing him.
Separation Arranged
Linda and I were in a defacto open marriage. I am not polyamorous and I did not want to remain forever part of an open marriage. Something had to give.
One afternoon, after several weeks of living as we were, I approached Linda.
“Do you still want to leave?” I asked her.
“Yes,” she answered somewhat sadly, “I do.”
Since Linda expressed her desire for us to separate, without malice, even though we were relating harmoniously, I decided the time had come to follow through.
“Okay,” I said, “First, you’ll need to find an apartment. Once you’ve done so, we’ll make the necessary arrangements for you to move. Of course we’ll have to figure out a way for both of us to remain active in Mary Ann’s life”
She responded, “I’ll start looking for a place. Then, we’ll discuss the other arrangements.” She didn’t sound very enthusiastic.
{Part III is here:}
